Relationships During a Pandemic: How to Stay Centered in Love

Starting a Relationship in a Pandemic

Right before the start of the COVID-19 pandemic I met someone, and I fell in love. We had no idea what was coming our way, all we were concerned with was each other. But when the pandemic hit we, along with many other new couples, were faced with some tough choices. Were we going to still see each other? Were we allowed to stay at each other’s houses? Was going from house to house ethical? In the end, we decided to move in with each other after only three months of dating.

I know… crazy. At least that’s what I would have said if someone had asked me a few months prior. In fact, after my last relationship I vowed to myself that I wouldn’t move in with a partner until at least 2 years of dating. It goes without saying that I broke that rule by a long shot. Nonetheless, the move ultimately helped me grow tremendously as a person. Overall, this pandemic has taught me a lot about partnership and how to stay centered in love.

At first, things were extremely fun. Everyone in the house was around more and spending lots of time together. The pandemic felt like a vacation from everyday life, and being in a new relationship added a warm glow to the whole situation. However, as weeks and months went by things began to feel more stagnant. Staying at home felt more like a restriction than a privilege.

Moreover, I started to feel the strain that COVID 19 puts on relationships. Being with another person all day every day can take a toll, and I found myself feeling a bit stifled. This pandemic is hard on partnerships of all kinds, but here are some tools that help me stay grounded in the love my partner and I share.

The Importance of Space

One of the most important tools I’ve found is taking space.

But how do you take space when you can’t leave the house?

Go outside. Getting outside and into nature alone has been such a restorative and loving practice for me. Even something as simple as going on a walk alone can bring spaciousness to your day. And if you can’t get outside, make space inside. Spend time in separate rooms, or put on headphones and listen to music or a guided meditation.

Taking space in these various ways will help you regain a sense of autonomy, which ultimately helps you come back to your feelings of love for the other person. I’ve witnessed firsthand how powerful space can be for relationships, and usually if I’m feeling grumpy or argumentative with my partner, deep down I am needing space. In fact, I would argue that space is a necessary component to a long lasting and loving partnership.

Have Emotional Check-ins

Another practice that has been essential for the health of my relationship is the sharing of emotions honestly and frequently. This may seem like a no brainer, but talking with my friends has shown me that a lot of couples struggle with this. It can be scary to share your feelings, even with the person that you love.

Sometimes admitting that we are experiencing anger or sadness can be hard because we want everything to “be okay”. Revealing our imperfections can be daunting, and we are often told that it is unattractive to unload our negative feelings onto our patterns. However, the truth is that we are not always “okay”. In fact, chances are that if you’re feeling crappy, so is your partner. Often, voicing the reality of these feelings to one another can bring a sense of relief to both people. In my experience honest sharing like brings partners closer instead of pushing them apart.

Be Gentle With Yourself and Your Partner

The biggest lesson that COVID-19 has taught me in regards to my intimate relationships, is to be kind to yourself and your partner. These are extremely trying times for everyone. From unemployment to the wildfires raging across the Western United States, we are all experiencing a lot of intensity.

So be gentle with you and your partner if you can. Acknowledge the hard times, and at the same time cherish the good moments that you have with each other. If you are ever feeling frustrated with each other, try and tap into the deep well of love that you hold for one another. That love is what will carry you through even the darkest moments.

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Savita Jyoti

Savita Jyoti

|Creative content writer and storyteller| Using words as a way to share snippets of my own human experience with others. More on my blog: www.desertmoonrise.com